I began to do what I’d done in the past.
As far as I could see, I was doing well. I got and went to the allotted meetings that the sober living home required of me. I also knew some of the people in the sober living home because we all came from the same drug and alcohol treatment center.
Although the he sober living home was not in a very good neighborhood, it was close to the ocean, which is what I really liked about it. There were always people at the convenience store that was just down the street and we were offered drugs on a regular basis but there is strength in number and we helped keep each other accountable and always said no. But there was that part of me that still wanted to “party”.
To make a long story shorter, I wasn’t doing recovery. I was just working, living a lie about my sobriety date and was trying to find relief in having sober fun. There was always drug talk in my house and a lot of romancing about the good ole days with my roommates. We began going to the strip club down the street and my roommate and I got a great idea that we could sell drugs but not do them, so the wheels were turning. He said he had a contact and could get some drugs in the next few days so I agreed that we could pull it off.
Follow along at: Coping, Dealing and Getting Your Haircut.