With my depression deepening and my loneliness taking over, I felt myself compelled to act on these emotions. Finally the day came when I convinced my brother and sister-in-law into letting me take the truck to a meeting. I worked hard to make them believe I was doing well. What they didn’t truly know was how much I was suffering.
Nor did they realize the tax return check I’d received in the mail was going to give me the financial means to get loaded again. So, under the guise of working my program by going to meetings, I left and didn’t get home until three in the morning. I was busted as soon as I walked in the door. They let me continue staying at their house, but the second chance they were giving me meant nothing at the time. I managed to find ways here and there to get loaded. A contact would meet me at a meeting or I’d just find some other way when I’d run out of my drugs.
As my addiction began to move into full gear, the girlfriend I’d been seeing off and off for awhile suggested I move back in with her. We both thought I’d be happier and maybe I wouldn’t want to get loaded so bad all the time. So I moved back in with her and all went well for a whopping three days. I was back into my full blown addiction, using continuously.
It didn’t matter where I was or what I was trying to do to have a more enjoyable life. I couldn’t stop on my own. Not so long after, my family did an intervention and I was off to my second drug treatment center.
Follow along with my blog at: Why is this Happening to Me?